Sharing

Last week KW and I had dinner with my best friend from work, Bee who also retired at the same time, and her husband, Eye. We get along really well with them and enjoy socializing as couples, so it is good for KW and Eye to be able to commiserate on being the working husbands for the retired ladies. Eye is not too far from "regular" retirement age, but KW has many years to go before he will get Social Security.

So what were the guys' expectations about our retirement? We did have a discussion, all four of us, that things were not going to be too different in terms of Bee or I cooking dinner (which we gave up years ago), or suddenly becoming domestic goddesses. Just not going to happen. Nor were we planning on meeting them at the door in cellophane ready for a hot time in bed. Well, probably not going to happen.

And I think that the guys have been pretty good natured about this major change in our lives. No unreasonable expectations regarding the state of the household. I have been going to the cleaners to pick up the laundry (which used to be impossible for us when we both worked), WHEN I remember to do it. I can be talked into going to the grocery (or at least Trader Joe's). I haven't actually cooked a dinner, but I have been more helpful and made a salad.

I can't help but wonder if there isn't some resentment because I am not going to work every day and he is. Sort of a question in KW's mind about what I am doing all day while he slaves away at the office. I have noticed that he tends to ask questions like - "What have you been doing all day?" But not too often. And not in a hostile manner.

But because I am sort of in the still-drifting stage of this retirement, I am not always able to say just what I did all day. I checked my email, read some blogs, two loads of laundry, went through a pile of mail, fed the cats about 20 times (don't they wish), and talked on the phone for several hours.

Eh, not much.